Remember those days in high school when young couples were stationed against the wall making out? Gross! Right? Then there’s that gnawing sensation that you wished you were on that wall or some wall making out, too.
Youthful love (or lust – whichever church you grew up in) is some sweet stuff! Makes you do crazy, uncalculated actions such as swap-spit with someone you hardly know. Ugh! Of course as an adult we warn young people about such things – especially with our nation’s run on teen pregnancy and fatherlessness, but inside of us (or maybe just me) there is a thrill that runs through our senses when we think about being swept away in young love.
My wife and I are 9 years apart. She was just coming out of high school when we first met. I waited 2 long years for her to become “legal” and as soon as she turned 18, I “innocently” took her out to lunch. I love my girl! She is my joy. I enjoy being somewhat older than her. But there are times when I speak of imagining ourselves in high school together and what kind of couple we would have been … O my! Scandalous! Of course it will only be in my imagination; but we have been married now coming this August 5th for 8 years and everyday (okay, almost everyday) my objective is to keep the love and the thrill I have for her young – like, high school, young.
I think that one of the lost arts in marriage is knowing how to keep the thrill. You know? That excitement that you had when you first met. That tinkling sensation that you got when you held each other’s hand – for the very first time. That electricity that ran down your back when you first kissed. And that euphoria of young love when you made out for the very first time. Then, of course, that innocent feeling – the virgin feeling – you got when you first made love your wedding night. (Your wedding night, right?) They say that time diminishes all excitements. If that’s true, then all efforts must be made to keep our love young. Why?
1. Makes you feel expectant - remember how you couldn’t wait to get to Math class because he/she was going to be there?
2. Makes the world slow down and then disappear .
3. Makes you oblivious to whoever is around (and anyone who think differently).
4. Make tap kisses feel like fire and holding hands like making love!
5. Makes nonsensical talk something worth listening to.
6. Makes silence charged with excitement.
7. Makes public shows of affection a private affair.
8. Makes embarrassing moments reasons to laugh.
9. Makes you feel important and sexy.
10. Add yours here _________________
Imagine our marriages a haven of attraction to each other. How would you react if everyday you saw or (at least) acted as though you were still in high school chasing each other like, like, like jocks and cheerleaders?
1. Act it out
If you haven’t been in high school for a while, think back on those days. Even if you were a geek like me who only had one short high school “relationship”, think of how those love birds in high school used to act like.
- Chase her. Let him run after you flailing your arms. Scream like a girl, threaten her like a boy (“I’m gonna get you.”)
- Hold her hand and examine it like you’re looking at a secret map. Ask him what he “sees”.
- Stare at her like you’ve never seen anyone so beautiful. Ask him, “What?” – in that sweet 16 year old voice.
- Hold her like it’s cold. Grab him like you need his heat.
- Make passes at each other.
2. Do PRIVATE things PUBLICLY
Now all actions being considered and in moderation, private acts done appropriately in public can be very exciting. This suggestion is not to make you an exhibitionist (cause that’s just gross), but to heighten you and your spouse’s sexuality. For … instance …
- Brush her breast with your elbow as though it was an accident. Slap his elbow like he did something he wasn’t supposed to do and say, “Hey,” like you got embarrassed.
- Run your hand up her thigh under the table. Push his hand back looking at him with that look that says, “Stop. Not here. You’re being inappropriate.”
- Find a wall and press her against it – quickly and suddenly kiss her passionately. Kiss him back, push him off, lick your lips, walk away, look back and smile at him.
- Quickly and mischievously touch her on her spot in a crowded place. Don’t let him touch you. Give her a few minutes or seconds, then try again.
- DON’T OVER DO ANYTHING PUBLICLY.
3. Be in heat! (Once in a good while.)
Yes, this is what high school students look like – in heat. Since all of these emotions and sensations are brand new, these walking pieces of hormones run around the hallways of their schools trying to do anything sexual with anyone that is willing. Well, you are married and you have but one hot momma or hunk! You have seen each other naked in the worst of days and have exchanged bodily noises and odors that would turn off even a pledging 16 year old. But there is something to be said about being in agonizing and hair-standing heat! Don’t wait for it to come! Generate it!
- Make it difficult for your spouse to anything ordinary in the house – grab her and make out with her like you just found out how. Suck on his neck or his ear for short fiery moments! If he comes after you, give in like your parents said, “No”.
- Make passionate love anywhere just when you’re about to go to work or in the middle of doing something unsexy like washing the dishes.
- Behave like you have not done anything sexual before in your life. Make it as though you’re exploring. Allow the feeling to build up. Ok … I can’t write anymore.
Now if your spouse has “lost” that feeling, be wise and reel him/her in like you’re still in high school. Young love knows what it wants and goes after it even in the face of shame.
These are my ideas. Got any to share? Give a comment and let me know. I just may make Mrs. Ayudtud blush even more than before by your suggestions.